3 Tips for What NOT to do on a First Date!
Tip #1 No Monologuing
Before I was a dating coach, I went out with a man who talked non stop on our first date.
Of course, I didn’t want to seem rude.
So I let him monologue about his life while he showed me pictures of his car, his house, his kids, his garden, his vacations and even where he worked.
It was the most boring date ever!!!!!!
Truthfully, that was partially my fault!
Guys talk to impress you and to keep silent gaps from happening. BTW….those gaps are big-time scary to men!
What I should have done, was contribute similar stories that related to what he was already sharing.
If I had, chances are, our conversation and our date would have been a lot more interesting.
On a first date, don’t be afraid to share your own stories in a back and forth exchange.
This is the time for identifying common threads between the two of you and it can only happen when both of you are able to talk.
Tip #2 Be Present During Your Date
My favorite story of all time is the one where a guy I knew met a woman who couldn’t put her phone down during their date.
She texted through drinks, salad and what sounded like a pretty good dinner.
By dessert, he was so done with this woman and her phone.
He got up, found the waiter, paid the bill and left her to her phone.
I get his frustration.
I had a friend who used to answer calls from her adult children every time we went to lunch.
It drove me crazy so you can only imagine how all this phone time during a date might drive a man up the wall.
Here’s the other problem, we lose our ability to multi-task.
You can miss big chunks of conversation while on your phone.
And truthfully its pretty embarrassing to look up over your reading glasses and say, “Could you please repeat that?”
So unless you have a 911 emergency you’re anticipating while on your date, my suggestion is to keep your phone in your purse.
Oh, and if he’s non stop texting, you can always do what my guy friend did and leave.
Tip #3 Don’t be his mommy on your first date
Let’s face it, you might be so used to taking care of others and so used to anticipating their needs that on a first date, you forget, go into auto-pilot and start trying to make the life of the guy sitting next to you easier.
I doubt you’ll reach over and cut his meat.
But you might try and get the attention of the manager if the service and food were bad or the attention of the waiter if you want a drink.
If you do, you’re coming across as his mommy and you’re basically saying without words that you don’t trust him to take care of himself or you.
And believe me, no man wants to be seen this way by a woman he desires in his life.
He wants and needs to be seen as your hero, your knight in shining armor who took care of you even on a first date.
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Love to hear more about what you wish you had NOT done on a first date.
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One should know what to do on a date or else it can be a disaster. This article is quite helpful. Thanks for sharing.
You are so welcome. Glad it was so helpful! Love and hugs~