What a man you’ve chosen!
George is one gorgeous hunk isn’t he? Being associated with him make’s you feel so cool and so alive. Everyone envies you wishing they were in your shoes.
The jet set lifestyle alone is such fun and so thrilling as the two of you travel in private jets back and forth between California, his private home in Italy and George’s latest movie set.
On a whim, George sends you 10 dozen white roses just to impress you. He wines and dines you at the best restaurants in the world with the best food and the best tables.
He shares with you tales of his antics with friends Brad (as in Pitt) and Matt (as in Damon) and Julia (as in Roberts).
He brings tears to your eyes…telling you stories about his beloved pet pig, Max who died in 2006 that he still misses. You have a lot of fun with George and you hope that you’re the one he’ll give up his bachelor days for and marry.
Life is always thrilling even if it is mostly about George and even if the world sees you as just one more in a line of many women who’ve tried to capture his heart.
Your pet poodle, Fifi dies while you’re together. George kisses you on the head, and says I’m sorry then goes back to his latest movie set. You excuse him for not really being there for you justifying his behavior…telling yourself how good life is with him.
And then one day…. George comes home and tells you he’s done with the relationship. He breaks your heart as he ships you out of his life.
Months later you see he is with someone else and you cry wishing you were still with him even if he wasn’t there for you when your beloved Fifi died.
Then there’s Tom…
What a sweet, kind, considerate and compassionate man Tom is.
Life is nice…calm, easy, simple with a few fun events or trips thrown in from time to time. You spend hours together sharing stories of your day over dinner or holding hands at a movie.
Sometimes you admit… his stories can be a bit boring and you’d never tell a soul but you have dreamt of what life with George Clooney would be like.
Yet, on the day you caught a cold, Tom made you soup and ran to the store for cough syrup and a humidifier so you could sleep better that night.
On your anniversary, he wrote you a beautiful poem from his heart and then… there are those days on his way home from work…he thinks of how much he loves you… and stops to get you a bouquet of your favorite flowers.
He always wants to hear about your day and when you say there is a problem with the car or the furnace…he takes care of it. Your safety and your happiness are a #1 priority to him.
Tom’s the kind of man who will love you, care about you and take care of you until the end of time.
So it’s time to ask you this question…who would you look for as your mate in life? George or Tom?
A lot of women love the George’s of the world-the edgy man who makes a woman feel alive with his flirtatious behavior, crazy lifestyle and handsome looks.
He can be the nicest man in the world to a lot of people but not very present or caring to the feelings of the lady he’s hanging out with in the moment.
And many women pass over the Tom’s of the world thinking they are kind of cute yet a bit boring.
A Tom type of man would be there for you-emotionally, physically and spiritually yet women throw these types of men away all the time thinking they just aren’t George.
George’s are the fun men. But as a woman over 50, when you look to your future for a committed relationship, do you want a playful nice George who is all about George, or do want a kind compassionate Tom, who is all about pleasing and loving you.
Would love to hear your thoughts about who you feel your Ideal Man is…George or Tom.
Until next time~
Believing in You!
P.S. Whenever you are ready, here are four ways I can help you find love after 50
#1: Get a copy of my book The Winning Dating Formula on Amazon
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#3: Work with me 1-on-1 or in my Group Program
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Great post LIsa,
It could have been written just for me 🙂
I’m definitely a George Clooney fan, but want the kind caring characteristics of Tom too! I’ll bear it all in mind, when I venture out into the dating world next time. Thank you!
Maxine
So glad you could relate Maxine 🙂 Can’t wait to hear who you decide to date -Tom or George. Lots of hugs to you
Lisa
Lisa: Your blog today just had EXCELLENT content. In reality, I don’t think the choice is quite that cut and dry. There are men available who have the best of both types; the honesty, compassion, acceptance, and loving nature of the Tom’s and yet the style, elegance, and zest for life of the George’s. I think your readers will get the Man They Want, if they are very clear and concise when they write their very detailed Wish List and design their Dream Boards. The Universe will find their perfect man; it works time and time again. It’s up to us, as women, to be clear about what we want and why we want it. Much begins with self love! Until we love and accept ourselves, it’s hard to ask the universe to bring us the perfect man who will love us.
My best,
Marcia
Marcia Reece
http://www.marriagemouse.com
http://www.amazon.com/author/marciareece
http://www.twitter.com/marciareece
Such wonderful words of wisdom Marcia and so true. It would be nice to have a little of both. I know you have a wonderful relationship and have written about it in your book, The Marriage Mouse. Thanks for sharing your thoughts here. Lots of hugs.
Ironic this should land in my email this week. I am debating the George vs Tom dilemma as I read this. I have history with George but though he is currently exclusive with me and my friends think he is”into me” I have told everyone that looks can be deceiving. Then Tom comes along. He is there whenever I need help. He does show up at my door with soup when I am sick and poetry is a regular occurence in my email box. The problem is he does not fit my vision of what my partner should look like. How can I be so shallow. I am a widow and had more of a quarter century with a man with Clooney looks but Tom’s personality. I am finding it “hard” to not want it all again. I get the point you make us, more importantly me. Look beyond the exterior, for the quality person underneath. I am coming around, but not without mis-steps. I do not do well with multiple intimate relationships, so the time to make a choice is now. Last week I told Tom that George was back in my life. He gallantly stepped aside but not without making me realize that I was probably letting the “better man go”. This week I will probably allow George to leave my life. Funny I gave a friends daughter this advise, “Never sleep with a man that you do not truly believe you can count on to do the right thing if anything went wrong.” I was not taking my own advise. George needs to go.
Shelly
Sounds Shelly like you’ve got it figured out. Hope you’ll keep us posted on how it goes.
Hi – Tom here. Shelly your post was good reading. I went back to Lisa’s content and said- hey what the heck, I already DO all the things damn Clooney does, plus what I do!
The only differentials are a) better looks, and b) flirtatious behavior (see (a))
And what can we Toms really do about flirting, if our looks are genetically inferior (despite normal weight and healthclub attendance)?
Women (many) are the same as they accuse men – throwing it all away for the eye candy. But in your 50s? We Toms see it go away months from now… so when we run into a great gal thinking its together… only to be Dear John’d at our age… well its hard not to say ‘Women, you can’t live with them, you … yep thats about it.”
Hi Tom
You’ve given us great insight into the male perspective. Often women forget you have feelings too.
I do think men and women try and date the cutest people out there because it makes them feel good about themselves to be seen with them. It’s like they got the BIG PRIZE…chances are the booby prize.
They hotties don’t always make the best boyfriends. It’s men like you Tom who may not be the cutest but sure are nice, caring and want to please a woman that will. Good luck!
Lisa thanks – and I know this is an older article that I am only recently posting, but I think it is really at the core of our ‘won’t grow up’ generation… even in our 50s.
I smell that eye candy philosophy, and I’m outa there…
Tom…It feels like both males and females of our age date like they are in their 20’s and they are missing great people not recognizing the unique qualities of people our age.
I’m so glad you are adding your comments in our community. Keep posting. Love hearing from you.
Lisa