4 Comments

  1. June 8, 2015 at 11:13 pm

    Beatrice

    Well, you may be right, but Ii is not easy to be sexually attracted to men who are carrying a 5 to 9 month pregnancy ahead of them. Women are also more likely to live longer then their male counterpart. So with every 10 extra pound the likelyhood of having a second career as a nurse increases. This is why we are more attracted to healthy man.

    I also think that over 50 women do not need a father for their children, many of us do not need the extra income or financial benefit of being in a couple
    So a men in our life has to be a plus in a different and so do we. Very few adult fifty something are either ready for this or can find the right person

    1. June 9, 2015 at 10:10 am

      Noquay

      So true Beatrice. A year ago, I watched my father, last of family slowly die from obesity related causes. Actually, in total, it was an 18 year journey, one entirely preventable. This wasnt like cancer, an accident, this was the result of decades of deliberate bad decisions. I was his sole caretaker, albeit from a distance. Since his passing, I thought I could enjoy the summer, go home and spend time the way I want to but the bills still keep coming in, limiting my ability to socialize, meet someone compatible or to put money into upgrading my home so I can get somewhere with better prospects. Ironically, my dad hated heavy women and most of his socialization was flirting with younger, attractive nurses. So yep, when I read that perhaps my only choice is to risk going thru that journey all over again, I balk big time. I feel badly for these dudes that constantly hit on you and cannot figure out why we reject them. Men too, have to BE the person they want to date. You’re right; men in our life now need to enhance, not burden, the lives we’ve already made for ourselves. I hate not having a partner; I’d really like to love and be loved again, be held, have a sex life, be able to celebrate a blasted holiday with a loved one, but at what cost?

  2. June 8, 2015 at 10:41 pm

    Debbie

    I want him to treat me with respect, to be honest with me, to make eye contact when we talk. I want him to appreciate my intelligence. I want him to surprise me periodically with an email, a phone call, a flower, just to let me know he’s thinking of me. I want him to hold my hand.

  3. June 8, 2015 at 7:10 pm

    Noquay

    Yes Lisa , you are right to a point. Dating should be fun but often is a stressful chore. Here, potential mates are few and far between, adding more stress knowing you may not meet someone else compatible for a very long time if you “blow it” on a date. True, It’s not just looks but how he treats you. Yes, attraction can grow, to a point. Having just got back on line after a two year hiatus, I am seeing that 50+ women are held to a higher standard, looks-wise, than are same aged men. No column tells men to settle for a large bellied (or hipped, or heavy legged) woman or any other trait he finds undesirable. Yet no matter how well many of us older women practice good self care, stay in good shape (50 is the new 30), we are expected to accept far less. Please do not take offense, but the reason many of us older chix want a fit, healthy man is pure biology and common sense. True, the big bellied guy may treat you like a princess but sadly he’s not likely to be around very long.

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