Dear Lisa…Should I Pay On A First Date?
Dear Lisa,
My marriage of 31 years recently ended. I’d love to find love again. It seems like forever that I’ve really loved a man. Do I need to wait a certain amount of time to start dating? Do men really like women over 50? Do I have a chance of finding love again at this stage of my life? Sorry for so many questions but I have no one else to turn to for answers about all of this. Thanks so much! Liz
Liz,
Yes you can find love again after 50.
But, it’s a good idea NOT to start the dating process until you are divorced and have healed from the person you spent 31 years with.
As long as you are married, you still have an emotional connection to each other. It might be a negative one but a connection is still there.
You’ll want to take some time to heal otherwise, you could end up attracting the same man with the same issues you left behind only in different clothes, with a different body, and a different job.
Many good single men over 50 are ATTRACTED to women over 50.
Often you’ll hear tales and stories of older men only wanting younger women.
For some this is true but for the majority, they want a woman in their life who they share a similar life and history with.
The best way to find love after 50 comes from knowing how.
A great place to start is by reading my Amazon Best Seller, The Winning Dating Formula for Women over 50. In this book, I’ll show you the steps for finding that Quality Man you want to share you life with.
So glad you reached out and that I could answer your over 50’s dating questions. My passion is helping women find love after 50. I know what a difference its made in my life and I’d love this for you too!
Have a Dear Lisa question? You can ask me yours when you click this link: Dear Lisa
Dear Lisa,
I just recently set up my profile for online dating. I am very hesitant about all of this. I am on a limited budget since my ex is not helping me with alimony and child support. I have always worked full time so I will be ok. My question is… when I meet up with someone for coffee, drinks or a real date do we pay dutch or should he offer to pay for me??? Marilyn
Marilyn,
The rule of thumb to follow is this: the one who does the “asking out” is the one who pays.
Usually that is the man and I’d let him pay for 2-3 dates before you start offering to chip in.
By this point, you’re developing a relationship so its ok if you want to make him a home cooked meal, or pick up the popcorn at the movies as a way of contributing.
You can always ask if you can split or take the check.
Men often won’t let you but do appreciate the offer.
Once you are in a full relationship, the two of you together can figure out what type of financial arrangement works best.
Many men have lost their shirt in this economy or half their 401k in their divorce…and as much as they’d love to pay for everything, they often can’t.
If you want to do more activities together, than splitting or taking turns paying is a great way to accomplish a lot more fun on a limited entertainment budget.
Dear Lisa,
I had a couple of dates with a man I liked. Last night, he ended it by telling me I didn’t know how to let a man be a man. I so don’t get this. Help! Eileen
Eileen,
We were brought up with the idea that we needed to be strong and independent women and we are!
We’ve raised kids, often had careers and supported everyone on their journeys in life.
We’ve made important decisions quickly and efficiently and we’ve become quite confident and resourceful at how to get things done especially when we’ve lived alone a long time.
Who else was going to do it for us?
Then along comes a man who…basically wants to be a man.
It makes him feel good to take care of things for you and to make sure you are ok.
It’s in his DNA from the caveman days.
A man wants to feel needed.
The problem is we’ve done things on our own for so long that we’ve gotten fast at doing them so we just do the task rather then wait for a man to maybe get it done for us.
If you want a real manly man, you have to find a way for him to feel like a man which means making the space for him to feel needed by you.
If you can’t do this…and it is hard after so many years…another option is the beta man who will let a woman dominate a relationship.
The choice is yours!
I found Lisa Copeland at just the right time in my life! My divorce had been final for one year so why was I still crying? After a complementary session with Lisa, she pinpointed at least three areas in my life that still needed healing. Through powerfully focused sessions, she taught me the tools to open my heart, bring out emotions that I had buried, and helped me to see that the way I looked at men (and myself) just wasn’t working. The initial work I did paved the way for the growth phase of our work together, one that I could use in my newly single state as well as my professional life. Lisa’s coaching is the best investment I made in myself, one that will pay off for years! Lisa M,
Until next time~
Believing in You!
P.S. Whenever you are ready, here are four ways I can help you find love after 50
#1: Get a copy of my book The Winning Dating Formula on Amazon
Where I will walk you through a step-by-step breakdown of the exact tools and strategies you need for attracting the right man into your life — Click here
#2: Join the Finding Love after 50 Facebook group
It’s our Facebook community where you can connect with me and a community of women ready to support you on your journey for finding love after 50 — Click here
#3: Work with me 1-on-1 or in my Group Program
I would love to learn more about your dating journey, understand where you might be stuck, and give you a personalized step-by-step blueprint to attract the right man. And maybe even talk about how we can work together.
If you are interested in learning more about how I can help, you can Click here to answer a few quick questions and schedule a call.
#4: Subscribe to my YouTube Channel
Click here to explore my YouTube channel for valuable tips on dating and relationships after 50! Discover insights that will empower you to attract the right partner with confidence.
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