I don’t believe have a definite ‘type’ because I never dated much in life. I think you can only deduce a type retrospectively with more than 2/3 examples of boys, guys, or men you dated & there are so few I had any involvement with plus they felt so very different to me, about all they each had in common was a Y chromosome (the biological determinant for being born a male)!
Instead my life has been pretty full of studies, work, hobbies, pets, then full-time parent care (both of mine got very sick very young with chronic progressive illnesses & have since died but I count myself fortunate to have been free to return the care they gave me as their beloved only child without trying to juggle too many competing life facets or people with wildly different needs & interests). I have very few regrets & no doubts about the choices I have made in my life, I believe I would make most of the same decisions at the same times if I got a life do-over.
Now my life revolves around my friends (my chosen family), personal development / growth & reworking my bucket list & dream goals that had to be on hold when my parents were ill, needed my care & me to be there for them when they were dying.
I never felt particularly compelled or called to have children of my own, so I never felt pressured to date or get married in my much younger ‘fertile years’ (20-40s, my parents didn’t really want me dating in my teen years and being a girl who was absolutely in love with her classes, well, frankly that doesn’t get you asked out when everyone else is busy rebelling against what you still love & enjoy).
The plus side of my cluelessness about types etc. is I’m not jaded or overly down about dating, the minus is I’m rather naive so one thing I’m working on is getting more of a finishing school education in the useful things I missed that others seem to have learned by their experiences which sound in many cases like they were tough ones.
I at least know that one of my deal breakers would be having to be a mom to children that aren’t already adults or are going to be on their own very soon (any pre-existing kids of someone else should at least be close to graduating high school if not already in college, graduate school or fully self-supporting). Grand-parenting or mentoring would be a role I would enjoy so long as I don’t have to do it in close quarters 24/7/365.
I always saw myself in a later life companionate marriage or committed partnership if I were to ‘go there’ at all. I’m still not sure that life choice is for me, but I have to say I’m having fun learning more about me, being as authentically myself as I can be without feeling coerced by anyone & becoming what I call a ‘baby elder’ (I’m 51).
I’m not sure I yet know all my deal breakers but besides ‘KFC Man’s’ fixation on the superficial (all looks & no depth, no presence, no thank you, appearances can be ephemeral), his utter lack of a sense of humor would be intolerable for me.
Did KFC Man not realize you were joking with him Lisa? Yikes! How tragic-comical.
I suppose online dating sites are still in their infancy. I read somewhere (sorry I’ve forgotten the exact source) where they work most to the advantage of people who are predominantly visually oriented (KFC Man should be in clover here, how odd he isn’t), so perhaps if they could be redone, the emphasis on other senses (like hearing or feeling / sensing) would be allowed to come into play. I know they are also places where deceptions small & great can happen so it’s best to not put too much stock into what people post online.
Oh well, it takes all kinds to make up a world.
August 5, 2020 at 5:35 pm
Jane
Let’s see…
Unless you’ve been living under a rock the winning formula book is silly.
It was nothing more than common sense to me, I was disappointed.
Time chatting with Lisa? The half hour I spent talking was about her telling me to buy her book.
The over 50 FB site is a hoot. If anything it has reassured me I’m not alone dealing with horrible guys.
I find it very sad that men in this age bracket are so cruel and stupid.
Best dating site, if I’ve learned anything it’s not the ones you pay for. Those guys think they are entitled, to what I don’t know.
Be smart, be safe, and above all – believe in yourself.
August 5, 2020 at 6:13 pm
Lisa
Jane…it’s important you choose a coach that you resonate with. I have women who love The Winning Dating Formula and keep it by their nightstand to refer back to. And I have women who have found love even during this pandemic following my system. That being said, there are a lot of dating coaches out there. The key is to find one who is a right fit for you. I know you’ll find one whose message feels right to you. Believing in you! Big hugs~
August 5, 2020 at 6:17 pm
Fish On A Bicycle
I don’t believe have a definite ‘type’ because I never dated much in life. I think you can only deduce a type retrospectively with more than 2/3 examples of boys, guys, or men you dated & there are so few I had any involvement with plus they felt so very different to me, about all they each had in common was a Y chromosome (the biological determinant for being born a male)!
Instead my life has been pretty full of studies, work, hobbies, pets, then full-time parent care (both of mine got very sick very young with chronic progressive illnesses & have since died but I count myself fortunate to have been free to return the care they gave me as their beloved only child without trying to juggle too many competing life facets or people with wildly different needs & interests). I have very few regrets & no doubts about the choices I have made in my life, I believe I would make most of the same decisions at the same times if I got a life do-over.
Now my life revolves around my friends (my chosen family), personal development / growth & reworking my bucket list & dream goals that had to be on hold when my parents were ill, needed my care & me to be there for them when they were dying.
I never felt particularly compelled or called to have children of my own, so I never felt pressured to date or get married in my much younger ‘fertile years’ (20-40s, my parents didn’t really want me dating in my teen years and being a girl who was absolutely in love with her classes, well, frankly that doesn’t get you asked out when everyone else is busy rebelling against what you still love & enjoy).
The plus side of my cluelessness about types etc. is I’m not jaded or overly down about dating, the minus is I’m rather naive so one thing I’m working on is getting more of a finishing school education in the useful things I missed that others seem to have learned by their experiences which sound in many cases like they were tough ones.
I at least know that one of my deal breakers would be having to be a mom to children that aren’t already adults or are going to be on their own very soon (any pre-existing kids of someone else should at least be close to graduating high school if not already in college, graduate school or fully self-supporting). Grand-parenting or mentoring would be a role I would enjoy so long as I don’t have to do it in close quarters 24/7/365.
I always saw myself in a later life companionate marriage or committed partnership if I were to ‘go there’ at all. I’m still not sure that life choice is for me, but I have to say I’m having fun learning more about me, being as authentically myself as I can be without feeling coerced by anyone & becoming what I call a ‘baby elder’ (I’m 51).
I’m not sure I yet know all my deal breakers but besides ‘KFC Man’s’ fixation on the superficial (all looks & no depth, no presence, no thank you, appearances can be ephemeral), his utter lack of a sense of humor would be intolerable for me.
Did KFC Man not realize you were joking with him Lisa? Yikes! How tragic-comical.
I suppose online dating sites are still in their infancy. I read somewhere (sorry I’ve forgotten the exact source) where they work most to the advantage of people who are predominantly visually oriented (KFC Man should be in clover here, how odd he isn’t), so perhaps if they could be redone, the emphasis on other senses (like hearing or feeling / sensing) would be allowed to come into play. I know they are also places where deceptions small & great can happen so it’s best to not put too much stock into what people post online.
Oh well, it takes all kinds to make up a world.
August 5, 2020 at 5:35 pm
Jane
Let’s see…
Unless you’ve been living under a rock the winning formula book is silly.
It was nothing more than common sense to me, I was disappointed.
Time chatting with Lisa? The half hour I spent talking was about her telling me to buy her book.
The over 50 FB site is a hoot. If anything it has reassured me I’m not alone dealing with horrible guys.
I find it very sad that men in this age bracket are so cruel and stupid.
Best dating site, if I’ve learned anything it’s not the ones you pay for. Those guys think they are entitled, to what I don’t know.
Be smart, be safe, and above all – believe in yourself.
August 5, 2020 at 6:13 pm
Lisa
Jane…it’s important you choose a coach that you resonate with. I have women who love The Winning Dating Formula and keep it by their nightstand to refer back to. And I have women who have found love even during this pandemic following my system. That being said, there are a lot of dating coaches out there. The key is to find one who is a right fit for you. I know you’ll find one whose message feels right to you. Believing in you! Big hugs~