How thoughtful of Lisa to repost our interview in the hope that it might be helpful.
Much has happened in the two years since that interview. The recent pandemic and shutdown have accelerated changes in trends that were already underway. One of the trends I was looking to highlight was the tendency of a number of guys in our age cohort to complain that our single women peers were “too picky” in what they were looking in potential partners (though who’s to judge how “picky” anyone should be!) Also, as a kind of explanation, the touchy subject of women’s upward mobility, particularly educated, professional women, made possible, in part, at the expense of their male peers. To mention that issue, as though it detracts from women’s sacrifices and achievements, can sound misogynistic whatever degree of truth there may be in it.
As Fish On A Bicycle surmises (Oh, that familiar expression!) I live in the heart of the radical Northeast where there’s a good deal of disdain for much of “flyover” country. And something I never expected to see: some progressive women denigrating women whom they consider less woke than themselves. It’s part of the ramped up hostility of the times.
In contrast, maybe in response to these difficult times, men and women of good will, who truly hope to find kind and loving partners, may now have a better chance than ever. Those of you who seek Lisa’s counsel are a self-selecting group who seem open to giving good men a shot even if we aren’t the 9’s and 10’s of the single male world. I expect you may find yourselves especially sought after once this bug lets up and we have less need to social and physical distance.
July 30, 2020 at 7:00 am
Ginger Narmour
I just heard your beautiful interview with Lee this morning. How wonderful that he expressed his perspective on men, women, and expectations so well. Honestly it’s been impossible to meet a man who speaks with such thoughtfulness and candor because there seems to be this invisible wall of bravado which I feel is there to shield them from future pain. After 3 years of being without a partner I tend to see that the men who have the potential to be amazing mates are often the ones we shy girls would love to be approached by but never are. It takes confidence on both sides and a willingness to be let in or passed by and that seems an impossible feat to achieve. Thank you, Lee, for sharing your heartfelt, helpful thoughts in such a positive way.
July 29, 2020 at 9:18 pm
pam
It was enlightening listening to Lee’s male perspective on dating.nice to knw they face some of our same struggles.
July 29, 2020 at 7:19 pm
Fish On A Bicycle
I’m curious, what part of the country does Lee live in?
Because where I live (rural Virginia) people still have the much more conservative mores & values he seems to prize but isn’t finding much in the women near him. Most women here are fine letting men take the lead.
Perhaps Lee needs to rethink where he’s looking for his Ms Right For Him, maybe even where he lives?
July 29, 2020 at 6:14 pm
Lindy Lane
Thanks for sharing this interview with Lee…it was really great to get the male perspective and shows we are all wanting the same and feel the same most of the time
August 2, 2020 at 9:33 am
Lee
How thoughtful of Lisa to repost our interview in the hope that it might be helpful.
Much has happened in the two years since that interview. The recent pandemic and shutdown have accelerated changes in trends that were already underway. One of the trends I was looking to highlight was the tendency of a number of guys in our age cohort to complain that our single women peers were “too picky” in what they were looking in potential partners (though who’s to judge how “picky” anyone should be!) Also, as a kind of explanation, the touchy subject of women’s upward mobility, particularly educated, professional women, made possible, in part, at the expense of their male peers. To mention that issue, as though it detracts from women’s sacrifices and achievements, can sound misogynistic whatever degree of truth there may be in it.
As Fish On A Bicycle surmises (Oh, that familiar expression!) I live in the heart of the radical Northeast where there’s a good deal of disdain for much of “flyover” country. And something I never expected to see: some progressive women denigrating women whom they consider less woke than themselves. It’s part of the ramped up hostility of the times.
In contrast, maybe in response to these difficult times, men and women of good will, who truly hope to find kind and loving partners, may now have a better chance than ever. Those of you who seek Lisa’s counsel are a self-selecting group who seem open to giving good men a shot even if we aren’t the 9’s and 10’s of the single male world. I expect you may find yourselves especially sought after once this bug lets up and we have less need to social and physical distance.
July 30, 2020 at 7:00 am
Ginger Narmour
I just heard your beautiful interview with Lee this morning. How wonderful that he expressed his perspective on men, women, and expectations so well. Honestly it’s been impossible to meet a man who speaks with such thoughtfulness and candor because there seems to be this invisible wall of bravado which I feel is there to shield them from future pain. After 3 years of being without a partner I tend to see that the men who have the potential to be amazing mates are often the ones we shy girls would love to be approached by but never are. It takes confidence on both sides and a willingness to be let in or passed by and that seems an impossible feat to achieve. Thank you, Lee, for sharing your heartfelt, helpful thoughts in such a positive way.
July 29, 2020 at 9:18 pm
pam
It was enlightening listening to Lee’s male perspective on dating.nice to knw they face some of our same struggles.
July 29, 2020 at 7:19 pm
Fish On A Bicycle
I’m curious, what part of the country does Lee live in?
Because where I live (rural Virginia) people still have the much more conservative mores & values he seems to prize but isn’t finding much in the women near him. Most women here are fine letting men take the lead.
Perhaps Lee needs to rethink where he’s looking for his Ms Right For Him, maybe even where he lives?
July 29, 2020 at 6:14 pm
Lindy Lane
Thanks for sharing this interview with Lee…it was really great to get the male perspective and shows we are all wanting the same and feel the same most of the time