How to cope with loneliness and the emptiness you feel inside as a single woman over 50
One of the hardest things you face as a single woman over 50 is the emptiness you feel inside when you’re missing a man in your life.
Everywhere you go, you see couples holding hands, kissing, and whispering in each other’s ear over the private life they share.
It intensifies the loneliness and makes you feel as if your life is incomplete.
In my 50’s, I can remember coming out of a long relationship feeling lost and very alone.
Instead of being part of TWO . . . I was now a “ONE” and I was having a hard time adjusting to my new status.
I shared this with a married friend of mine who gave me some great advice.
She said, “Enjoy this time of getting to know you again. Once you’re back in a relationship, you’ll wish you’d had more of it.”
This was great advice but I was at a loss for finding me again.
All I wanted to do was be part of a couple once more.
Then one day, I woke up and it’s as if while I was sleeping, I was given 3 Steps on how to open my heart to myself, my life and ultimately love with a man again.
Give these 3 Steps a try and let me know how they fill the emptiness for you.
Step #1
Being alone, you can really feel it when love is missing from your daily life.
But, how do you get that heart energy back when you’re single?
Chances are you spent years bending like a pretzel doing what an ex or everyone else wanted to do.
You put yourself last.
Now it’s time to dream again and do the things you’ve always wanted to try without having to run it past anyone but you.
This can be both exciting and freeing at the same time.
For me, I’d always wanted to take a painting class.
I did and today those paintings hang framed around my home.
Seeing them every day makes me so happy.
I just light up inside because I went after my dream of becoming an artist.
Now it’s your turn. Write a list of what you’ve always wanted to do.
Take an action step by choosing one and start doing it this week.
You’ll find that your passions can open your heart and make you glow.
Step #2
You can feel love in your heart without involving a man.
Start by making a list of all the people, animals or places in your life you love.
I am blessed to have two granddaughters in my life.
When I was single and feeling alone, I’d tap into my feelings of how much I loved them.
My heart just opened up and that felt amazing.
You will want to ask yourself who do you love with all your heart?
Maybe it’s your dog, cat, kids, grandkids, friends, parents?
Whoever it is, just allow those feelings of love you’re feeling to flow through you.
This is a very comforting step that helps you remember that love can be felt in all different ways, not just as part of a couple.
Step #3
Treat yourself and do something to nurture YOU every day.
As women, we have a tendency to give to everyone but ourselves.
This can leave you feeling both drained and exhausted.
When you’re exhausted you feel empty and it’s pretty hard to give or get the love you want.
Planning a fun 5 minute or 2-hour activity gives you something to really look forward to every day.
It can be as simple as reading a book in the bathtub surrounded by luxurious bubbles while sipping on your favorite glass of wine, or taking a walk at your favorite park or buying yourself a bauble you’ve always wanted.
To help you, I’ve created a Nurturing Calendar that you can download and print by clicking here.
Getting a guy is pretty hard when you feel empty inside and that’s why these 3 steps are so important to incorporate into your life.
I would love to hear about who and what fills your heart. I hope you’ll post a comment by clicking the button below.
Until next time…Lots of love and hugs to you!
Believing in You!
P.S. Whenever you are ready, here are four ways I can help you find love after 50
#1: Get a copy of my book The Winning Dating Formula on Amazon
Where I will walk you through a step-by-step breakdown of the exact tools and strategies you need for attracting the right man into your life — Click here
#2: Join the Finding Love after 50 Facebook group
It’s our Facebook community where you can connect with me and a community of women ready to support you on your journey for finding love after 50 — Click here
#3: Work with me 1-on-1 or in my Group Program
I would love to learn more about your dating journey, understand where you might be stuck, and give you a personalized step-by-step blueprint to attract the right man. And maybe even talk about how we can work together.
If you are interested in learning more about how I can help, you can Click here to answer a few quick questions and schedule a call.
#4: Subscribe to my YouTube Channel
Click here to explore my YouTube channel for valuable tips on dating and relationships after 50! Discover insights that will empower you to attract the right partner with confidence.
Copyright© 2024 Lisa Copeland. All rights reserved.
Dear Lisa
Thank you soo much for your post.I read them with great appreciation.All you write is true I lived it and taught I was way to emotional.I have been a widow for 3 years. I understand better now.💚
Thank you Fern. Love helping women find self love. Its tremendously empowering and it brings out the Unique You. Let me know the steps you do and how they work out. Lots of hugs to you!
I agree totally. It isn’t the total answer but it helps now! Now is when it is most important. I walk, I get to see others on the beautiful lake trail or beach when I walk n smiling n telling them Good Morning makes me feel great. I draw n plan other projects n feel so good when I share them with friends. I give my grandson 1 or 2 days a week, he is 2, we have such fun together. I still envy the couples who walk hand in hand,stealing a quick kiss from time to time…butGod has a plan, my plan, and I m alot more “marketable” a smiling, happy lady who leads a busy life than I would b if I appeared to b sad and worried waiting on someone…be happy everyone, it is your best beauty feature…
Awesome Sherry! Enjoy you…that’s what its all about! Hugs~
Awesome! Thanks for great advise lisa ..
Love and hug you back
Your so welcome! So appreciate you letting me know. Hugs to you~
Lisa
Thanks for writing this. After being overlapped/cheated on at the end of my last rship, which was incredibly devastating, I’ve really done some introspection:
1. Since I live in a rural area and compatible, values sharing men are a minimum of 100 miles away, being cheated upon, ghosted, etc is almost a given. Therefore, I am trying to find community that is environmentally and outdoor oriented yet allows me to live my lifestyle, a mix of high outdoor activity yet being very cultured. Remaining here will always limit my rship options to staying alone or settling for the totally incompatible or accepting a high likelihood of heartbreak.
2. Having no living family and family, unfortunately, never being a source of support means I work hard seeking like minded and like valued folk
3. As a serious older athlete, until I can relocate, focusing on increasing/maintaining fitness is the best way to cope with disappointment, loneliness, constant frustration
4. Focusing on job alternatives, selling off another property, preparing the house here for sale come Spring are also ways of coping and retaining a sense of control.
5. Again, due to location and perhaps my race (s), and that sadly, most 50-70 men on line in this state are unhealthy, less educated, and often financially precarious, on line is going to be disappointing and not to take it personally. Can’t control demographics.
6. Although I really need the high salary to retire, my current job is very stressful, unfulfilling plus the situation is steadily worsening; time for a change
I guess overall, despite a lot of stuff in life going horribly wrong over the past year, my way to cope with loneliness as despair is to focus on that which I can control and let go of those things which I have no power over.
Love the process you went through Noquay. And you are so right. the only thing we have control over is how we react. Keep up the great work and I hope it won’t be long before you can move to an area that bring you happiness. Lots of hugs~
Interesting article. In my case, I am single and 58. I have always been single and haven’t dated in over 20 years. So, this is not a time to relish or rediscover myself. I have spent far too much time on myself! In my case, I’ve lost that zest for life. I’ve read countless articles on dating over 50 — gaining confidence, self-love, etc.. But, for me, I haven’t met a single, quality man in so long. I think my focus is on accepting the loneliness that comes with this stage of my life.
Not to be a downer, just a practical assessment. Not everyone is coming out of a marriage with kids that relishes the time to rediscover.
Hi Liz…I’ve found that there are a lot of quality men out there. The problem is, most women can’t see them. That comes from defining men using chemistry and specific qualities versus values and how you want to feel around him. This is the most important piece for finding love and its something I teach everyday to women. I hope you will reach out if you want to know more. You really can find love. You just have to know where to look. Lots of hugs to you!