Are you over 50 still dating like you’re 20?
So many women ask me why dating is so difficult for them.
What’s the answer?
Well that’s easy!
We are over 50 but we like to date as if we were still in our 20’s.
After all, we still wear jeans and we still have long hair, unlike our mothers who used to cut their hair once they were married.
With vibrant memories of our college years still floating around in our heads, there is just no way we feel or look like we are in our 50’s, 60’s or 70’s.
And that’s why we still look at members of the opposite sex like we did in our 20’s.
Most of us still want that handsome football captain who is so popular and successful.
We go online with our 20-year-old mind and who pops up?
50 plus-year-old men who look like our grandfathers with grey thinning hair, a belly and a boatload of baggage.
No wonder it seems like no one’s out there to date – they all seem too old for us!
But, we have our stuff too.
While men are balding, we are finding strands of hair popping up all over the place.
In fact, if you think about it, hair removal could probably be a full-time job for us after 50.
And we often have leftover pregnancy weight from 20 years ago, spider veins becoming more visible every day and hormones that wreak havoc with our systems and put the fear of God into anyone within 10 feet of us on a bad day.
A couple of years ago, I remember seeing a picture on Facebook of my handsome high school sweetheart who, by the way, did play high school.
I was shocked!
The young man I remembered had long black hair and wore painter’s pants.
In my mind, I expected an older version of the black haired painter’s pants wearing man.
Although still handsome, he looked like his father with snow-white hair and a suit.
In my mind, there was no way I could look that old too!
But I probably do.
I just don’t see it.
In fact, a wonderful gentleman told me this story that we can all relate to.
He was getting ready to post his picture online and his daughter says, “Dad, Why are you posting a 10-year-old picture of you online?”
He confided in me that the picture was how he still saw himself and didn’t realize his face had aged since it was taken.
None of us like to think we are getting older, but we are… and so are the men we are looking at to date.
There are some men who are still handsome and have aged well and there are some who haven’t, but as we get to know their personality, they grow on us and become a lot cuter.
Decide what is really important to you when it comes to a companion who will age with you into your 60’s and 70’s.
Do you want a lover?
A friend?
A man who will be with you through thick and thin?
Do you want a man who views you through his eyes as hot and will love you even more as you age always believing in his eyes that you are beautiful?
He’s out there waiting for you.
Quite possibly as one of those balding men staring back at you from your computer screen.
If he seems nice…consider giving him a chance to get to know you.
You might find that this man who looks over 50 with his thinning hair may be the wonderful loving man you’ve been looking for.
Let me know how it works out for you.
“Lisa, I wanted to let you know that I walk around with my Quality Man Template in my bag that we created in my VIP Experience with you. I look at my template and my 3 Must Have Qualities and read them daily.
It has helped me tremendously. At the moment, I’m dating 3 yes 3 men who meet both lists.
We’ll see what happens. I know my guy is out there and I’m so excited that after working with you, I can now see them.”
Lots of Hugs, Teri, New York
P.S. This month something rare is happening.
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Your Next Steps to Love after 50. . . .
💞 Feeling like you are on a merry-go-round of mismatched dates? Lets press pause and talk about how we can write a new love story for you. Click here to start our conversation. Tell me your story – I am here to listen and guide you towards meeting someone truly special.
If you are still gearing up for that step, I have plenty of insights and inspiration for you:
1. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for heartfelt dating wisdom and uplifting success stories from women who have been just where you are. They found love, and so can you. Click here to watch and learn.
2. Discover a new chapter in your dating life with my book, "The Winning Dating Formula." It is more than a book; it is your journey to love mapped out. And it is just a click away on Amazon. Click here and start attracting the love you deserve.
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4. On the lookout for a dating site that resonates with you? Browse through my personal selection of the best dating sites tailor-made for fabulous over 50s. Click here and say goodbye to guesswork.
Let these resources be your steppingstones to a love life filled with promise and joy. When you are ready, I am here to take that journey with you. Together, lets find your Mr. Right! 🌹
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Copyright© 2024 Lisa Copeland. All rights reserved.
Sounds to me like you’re just telling women over 50 to just settle for w hat they can get! Why should we? I don’t want no bump on a log with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel. I need a man who can keep up with me! Men get to have whatever they want when they dao, even younger women…so why shouldn’t we women get what we want? 🙁
When I work with clients, we create a Quality Man Template that focuses on exactly who they want. Sometimes a guy who has everything on their template is cute but the chemistry is missing. Because he had everything, they gave the man a chance since he was cute and he was really nice. As they got to know each other, the chemistry developed and my clients found themselves in great relationships that had everything they wanted. You never want to settle!
I’m 50, but many credible people have told me I could pass for late 30s. The difference between different men at my age us extreme. I’m not looking for a 20-something jock. I was never interested in those guys anyway. But I am looking for a guy who takes care of himself and is vibrant, energetic and passionate about life. Those mrn don’t look like you’re description. I’m not going to compromise on that.
Get really clear on the values that are important to you along with the qualities you want and your deal breakers. For you, a couch potato might be a deal breaker. You don’t have to compromise when you have a very clear vision of the man who is right for you. Do this with all my clients when we create a Quality Man Template. This tool is like an order to the Universe that this is what you want and magically, they start showing up. A clear vision makes a huge difference in the dating game.
Great column Lisa. My reply is directed to your female readers. I am a 63-year old man, decent looking, smart and successful. I always tailor my messages when contacting women on Match or Our Time to show I actually read their profile. Still, few acknowledge my notes or respond. I got to thinking, they must be holding out for their idealized version of a man. I would remind them that the guy you covet is probably looking for someone 10-15 years younger than you. There are plenty of quality men in your age range who may not “float your boat” but still have much to offer. Attraction can grow, so open yourselves to more possibilities and you may spend fewer Saturday nights alone.
Thank you Brendan for your thoughts. Dating has become difficult for both sexes with online dating being like a candy store. Again so appreciate you taking the time to write. I hope women view your comments and see what they are missing from the male perspective.