Are These 3 Dating Mistakes Keeping You From Finding Love After 50?
Mistake #1…Conducting a date like it’s a job interview
I know this sounds funny.
But if you’re like most single women over 50, you’re probably carrying some FEAR around the idea of failing again when it comes to choosing the right man to share your life with.
This time you think you have to get it right.
You come up with a list of exactly who Mr. Right must be and what he must have going on in his life to date you.
You email with a good man online who seems to have the qualities on your list.
You hit it off and decide to meet for coffee or a drink.
During the date, you start mentally checking off his positive and negative qualities on your imaginary list.
If he’s missing one thing, he doesn’t stand a chance with you.
Guess what? You miss good men dating this way.
It’s worth taking a page from our youth when you just hung out with a guy for the fun of it.
You didn’t make snap decisions like you probably do today.
You didn’t interview men to be your boyfriend or husband.
What you did do was you lived in the moment and had fun getting to know a new person.
So many women tell me they know within 3 minutes or less whether a man is right for them.
I ask them, “What do you base this on?” and the answer I always get is, “I can just tell.”
Heads up here: NO, you really can’t tell this quickly.
What you can tell is whether you have immediate chemistry with a man and as good as that may feel, it’s not enough.
If a guy seems like a good guy, you want to take the time to get to know him so you can assess who he really is.
Sometimes, chemistry can take time to kick in.
I’ve had clients go out with great men because they had everything on their Quality Man Template.
For some it took 3 dates for the chemistry to kick in for others it took 3-4 months.
They always tell me, they were glad they allowed themselves the luxury of time to really get to know a new man; feeling it was so worth it.
Mistake #2…Talking about your ex on a first date
I’m sure you know this tip already but what you may not know is the real reason you don’t want to ex bash on a first date.
So here goes . . . Men are designed to fix problems for you.
When your ex creates havoc in your life and you share it with a new man, what you’re doing is putting him in the fixer role.
You may just want to process the situation; something we do with our friends all the time.
But men don’t process like women do since they are wired to fix.
And since he can’t fix something for you because he doesn’t know you yet, he feels inadequate.
No man wants to look less than in your eyes.
Instead, save processing the drama to girls night out with your friends.
They know you and can offer you the emotional comfort you need in the moment.
Mistake #3…Losing your identity to a man
Be honest, when a man comes along do you find yourself giving up your life hoping he’ll invite you to share in what he’s doing?
Maybe you stop going out with your friends thinking you’ll go out with his instead.
Or you put your life on hold waiting to see what he’s going to do with his.
When you do this, your Inner Glow dims.
To a man, you become dull and maybe even a bit clingy and needy because you start depending on him to fill in the missing pieces you’re giving up in your life just to be with him.
Keep your Inner Glow going by continuing the activities that you’re passionate about.
Enjoy time with your friends.
Remember your passion for your life is what attracted him to you in the first place.
Don’t give that up!
It doesn’t matter if you’ve achieved success already. It doesn’t matter if you consider yourself strong and motivated and capable of finding love after 50, or of “recovering” from a setback or a dating rut.
If you don’t have the support of a really good coach – and a community of like-minded people – chances are high you’ll experience unpredictable results in your love life.
And let’s face it; it’s hard to feel safe when you’re stuck in a pattern of not knowing what to do next, right?
But it IS possible to have the right man and the relationship you dream about!
The Find Love after 50 group coaching program could be what you’ve been looking for that can help you attract your ideal man into your life. Is one of the spots yours?
If this is calling to you . . . if you have a positive attitude and appreciate strong and purposeful guidance to get you where you want to be . . . Then start by clicking here and tell me a little about yourself.
If I think I can help you, I’ll send you a link to my calendar so we can set up a time to talk.
Together, we’ll decide if the Find Love after 50 group is right for you and how it can help you get the man and relationship you want.
Believing in You!
Your Next Steps to Love after 50. . . .
💞 Feeling like you are on a merry-go-round of mismatched dates? Lets press pause and talk about how we can write a new love story for you. Click here to start our conversation. Tell me your story – I am here to listen and guide you towards meeting someone truly special.
If you are still gearing up for that step, I have plenty of insights and inspiration for you:
1. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for heartfelt dating wisdom and uplifting success stories from women who have been just where you are. They found love, and so can you. Click here to watch and learn.
2. Discover a new chapter in your dating life with my book, "The Winning Dating Formula." It is more than a book; it is your journey to love mapped out. And it is just a click away on Amazon. Click here and start attracting the love you deserve.
3. Join our Finding Love after 50 Facebook group to find camaraderie and connection. It is a warm and welcoming space to share your journey and receive support every step of the way. Click here to become part of our community.
4. On the lookout for a dating site that resonates with you? Browse through my personal selection of the best dating sites tailor-made for fabulous over 50s. Click here and say goodbye to guesswork.
Let these resources be your steppingstones to a love life filled with promise and joy. When you are ready, I am here to take that journey with you. Together, lets find your Mr. Right! 🌹
Love this article? Sign up by clicking here to receive my weekly blog.
Copyright© 2024 Lisa Copeland. All rights reserved.
