As a 58 yo, mixed race, highly educated outdoorswoman, looking for an equal, I am pretty much persona non grata in the online dating world. However, settling for someone I wasn’t attracted to or shared values with wasn’t working either. No family either plus a deteriorating job situation lead to crushing periods of loneliness despite that I am a somewhat solitary sort. Have quit my Professorship and am in the process of putting my home on the market. A time of great turmoil, second guessing, sadness, regret, and feelings of failure but also looking forward to at least some time sans schedules and stultifying routines, of time to get outdoors daily, to fixing stuff, to being in deep woods away from drought and forest fires. Sadly, I reacquainted with a gentleman, albeit much older than I, with whom I have an amazing intellectual connection. I’ve made it clear that Colorado isn’t working for me, he has made no overtures towards cohabitation or marriage, so I’m outta here. Realize in my very isolated farmcommunity I’ll still be persona non grata (was married when I lived there before) but it may well be worth it in order to regain physical and emotional health. Sometimes our loneliness is caused by a combination of many things; we really need to do the work, see what all the issues are. Alone or not, this ok lady intends to kick serious a$$ from here on out🙋🏾
August 9, 2018 at 10:42 am
Stephanie Bailey
Thanks for sharing information for women over 50. It seems we are forgotten and issues that pertain to us don’t matter and are not addressed. I totally agree with the 3 steps on how to open my heart to myself, my life and ultimately love with a man again. I need to focus on making them a part of my daily life.
August 9, 2018 at 10:54 am
Lisa
You’re so welcome Stephanie. Let me know how adding these to your daily life helps you. Sending you so many hugs~
August 9, 2018 at 12:32 am
Natalie
Thank you, Lisa, for sharing these beautiful coping strategies. They are simple and inspiring reminders for the aching heart!
August 9, 2018 at 9:14 am
Lisa
You’re so welcome Natalie. I’m glad it was helpful!
August 8, 2018 at 8:57 pm
Judy Alley
I am 78 years old. Three years ago, my husband decided that he didn’t want to be in a marriage anymore. So after 36 years of being “two”, I became “one”. It was really hard at first, but now I love being alone and on my own. Someone on “Sixty and Me” said, “they would like to have a man in their life, but not in their house”. I’m not so sure now, that I even want a man in my life. I travel alone through Road Scholars, quilt, knit, have several close friends that I go to lunch, coffee and movies with. I am in a Life Long Learning group through the University of Minnesota that meets every month to study subjects of interest and books. I connect with my daughters and granddaughters as much as possible. I love the freedom I now have and wouldn’t change it for anything. I’m a young 78, in good health, eat nutritionally well, exercise and am a voracious reader. Life is good!
August 9, 2018 at 9:14 am
Lisa
Sometimes Judy, when one door shuts another amazing one opens. Enjoy!!! Hugs~
August 13, 2018 at 2:10 pm
Noquay
As a 58 yo, mixed race, highly educated outdoorswoman, looking for an equal, I am pretty much persona non grata in the online dating world. However, settling for someone I wasn’t attracted to or shared values with wasn’t working either. No family either plus a deteriorating job situation lead to crushing periods of loneliness despite that I am a somewhat solitary sort. Have quit my Professorship and am in the process of putting my home on the market. A time of great turmoil, second guessing, sadness, regret, and feelings of failure but also looking forward to at least some time sans schedules and stultifying routines, of time to get outdoors daily, to fixing stuff, to being in deep woods away from drought and forest fires. Sadly, I reacquainted with a gentleman, albeit much older than I, with whom I have an amazing intellectual connection. I’ve made it clear that Colorado isn’t working for me, he has made no overtures towards cohabitation or marriage, so I’m outta here. Realize in my very isolated farmcommunity I’ll still be persona non grata (was married when I lived there before) but it may well be worth it in order to regain physical and emotional health. Sometimes our loneliness is caused by a combination of many things; we really need to do the work, see what all the issues are. Alone or not, this ok lady intends to kick serious a$$ from here on out🙋🏾
August 9, 2018 at 10:42 am
Stephanie Bailey
Thanks for sharing information for women over 50. It seems we are forgotten and issues that pertain to us don’t matter and are not addressed. I totally agree with the 3 steps on how to open my heart to myself, my life and ultimately love with a man again. I need to focus on making them a part of my daily life.
August 9, 2018 at 10:54 am
Lisa
You’re so welcome Stephanie. Let me know how adding these to your daily life helps you. Sending you so many hugs~
August 9, 2018 at 12:32 am
Natalie
Thank you, Lisa, for sharing these beautiful coping strategies. They are simple and inspiring reminders for the aching heart!
August 9, 2018 at 9:14 am
Lisa
You’re so welcome Natalie. I’m glad it was helpful!
August 8, 2018 at 8:57 pm
Judy Alley
I am 78 years old. Three years ago, my husband decided that he didn’t want to be in a marriage anymore. So after 36 years of being “two”, I became “one”. It was really hard at first, but now I love being alone and on my own. Someone on “Sixty and Me” said, “they would like to have a man in their life, but not in their house”. I’m not so sure now, that I even want a man in my life. I travel alone through Road Scholars, quilt, knit, have several close friends that I go to lunch, coffee and movies with. I am in a Life Long Learning group through the University of Minnesota that meets every month to study subjects of interest and books. I connect with my daughters and granddaughters as much as possible. I love the freedom I now have and wouldn’t change it for anything. I’m a young 78, in good health, eat nutritionally well, exercise and am a voracious reader. Life is good!
August 9, 2018 at 9:14 am
Lisa
Sometimes Judy, when one door shuts another amazing one opens. Enjoy!!! Hugs~